Hello! I’m Jarlin.
I’m a life coach, change catalyst and self-love advocate dedicated to helping you live a deeply joyful and fulfilling life based on who you really are and what you truly desire.
My mission is to help you create and live a life you love: one that lights you up, one that fills you with joy and satisfaction, and one that positively contributes to the world in a way that is personally meaningful to you.
I believe that life is meant to be loved and enjoyed and savored. I believe that life is meant to be lived with ease and delight and excitement, not struggle or fear or stress. I believe that you make your greatest contribution to the world when you live life based on what you truly want, instead of what others expect of you.
And most importantly, I believe that the most direct path to such a life…if not the only path…is through self-love.
I didn’t always hold this view.
In fact, until not too long ago, I believed the exact opposite.
I thought that success and happiness must be earned, through continuous hard work, perpetual self-improvement, and universal social acceptance and approval (by being nice, considerate, and self-sacrificing).
For thirty plus years I relentlessly pursued perfectionism in all areas of my life. I was the perfect child, student, and employee. I earned multiple degrees from prestigious schools and worked for a Fortune 500 company. Well-liked by everyone, I was the responsible and dependable one whom friends and family sought out for advice and comfort. I made a great income, lived in a beautiful house, and traveled every year and dined in Michelin-starred restaurants.
I was doing all the right things to achieve success and fulfillment according to the conventional formula, yet I was deeply unhappy.
I was utterly exhausted from fulfilling all the obligations and expectations and responsibilities. I didn’t find my career satisfying or meaningful. I was frantically trying to hold it all together by myself and pretend that all was well, but inside I felt like everything was falling apart.
I had no idea what I wanted and what would make ME happy.
Being a big proponent of self-improvement, I started reading self-help books and signed up for online programs to “find my purpose” and “uplevel my life”. I studied spiritual teachings and hired life coaches. I even took training to become a coach, so I could coach myself!
I was desperately seeking answers from any source I could find so I could finally fix my life, yet no relief or solution came. With every passing day I felt more defeated and hopeless, fearful that it was already too late, that I was too flawed to do something meaningful or have a life I can be proud of. I struggled along for a few more years…
…and then, I had my big “A-HA!” moment.
I finally realized that the reason behind my lack of progress was NOT that I didn’t learn the right wisdom and tools, or that I didn’t take enough action to make changes, or that I wasn’t trying hard enough. It was how I did the learning, the changing, the trying.
It was how I approached my entire life.
It dawned on me that I would remain unhappy, unfulfilled, and stuck in fear and overwhelm as long as I lived life from a place of self-criticism and self-judgment. And clarity would continue to elude me as long as I only looked externally for answers to my life questions!
I decided to experiment and take a radically different approach to life. (Click here to read what forced me to make this decision. I wish I could tell you that it was because I finally figured it out once and for all, but really, it was because nothing else had worked! 😉 )
I started to explore the idea of self-love.
I begin to incorporate all that it entailed – self-worth, self-awareness, self-acceptance, self-care, etc. – into every aspect of my life. I treated myself with compassion and understanding vs. harshness and criticism. I turned inward for answers instead of relying solely on external sources. I recognized my efforts and celebrated my successes. I acknowledged my needs and honored my desires. I examined the motivation behind my drive for perfection with genuine curiosity instead of judgment. I stopped treating myself as a giant never-ending improvement project.
And… I finally gave myself permission to stop white-knuckling my way to transformation and enlightenment.
For anything and everything in my life, I asked this question:
“How can I add a little self-love?”
And that changed EVERYTHING for me.
Today, my life couldn’t be more different.
I treat myself with compassion, kindness and respect. I live my life according to my truth and core values. I’m crystal clear on my life purpose and what makes me happy. I’m excited about the work I do and how I contribute to the world. I take action out of love and genuine desire, instead of fear and obligation and expectation.
I surround myself with people, things, and experiences that light me up and bring me joy. I am much more deliberate about who or what comes into my space and how I allocate my time, energy, and attention. I say no to anything that doesn’t fill me with happiness or fulfillment, no matter how “good” it is for me. I greet each day with excitement and gratitude. I take time to savor the seemingly ordinary moments in my life.
I continue to strive to do my best and be my best every day, but no longer out of a need to prove my worth and value, but from a place of genuinely desiring growth and expansion. I still make mistakes, but I no longer let them define who I am or what I’m capable of.
Instead of my own biggest critic, I’m now my biggest champion and believer.
I feel happier and more satisfied with my life now than ever before. I’m having way more fun. And I’m beyond certain that the best is yet to come!
How is that for a total transformation?
And if I can transform my life so completely with all of my perfectionist, approval-seeking, people-pleasing, “no pain no gain” tendencies and beliefs…
SO CAN YOU!
You don’t need to white-knuckle your way to success or earn your right to happiness. Your deeply joyful and fulfilling life will unfold naturally when you choose to honor your needs and follow your desires.
You don’t need to sacrifice yourself in order to make the world a better place. Your greatest contribution can be achieved when and only when you’re doing what lights you up and fills your soul with joy.
You are not here to prove your value or demonstrate your worth. You’re here to shine. You are here to experience and savor life, to discover and explore, to grow and expand, to play and have fun…
…because living a deeply joyful and meaningful life based on what you truly desire is your birthright.
Add a little self-love, and watch your life transform. And that’s how you change the world.
Let me show you HOW.
Random fun facts…
My close friends call me Jar.
I was born in Shanghai, and live in the San Francisco Bay Area.
I’m an Aquarius, born in the year of the Dragon.
I have an adorable maltipoo named Bella. This is her waiting for me to finish taking her picture so she can chow down her birthday dinner!
I love to travel. My favorite spots around the world (so far!): Kyoto, Barcelona, Chicago, and the Amalfi Coast.
I enjoy eating, A LOT.
I’m a firm believer in the power of sleep, especially naps.
I adore luxury, elegance and beauty. I also value quality, simplicity and order. I love creating beautiful spaces and I’m big on organizing! If I wasn’t a life coach, I’d be a professional organizer and decorator. Actually, I might combine the two soon.
I have a weakness for beautifully-written words, gorgeous footwear, and all things tea!
And one of my favorite quotes of all time:
Jarlin Sung is a Martha Beck trained Life Coach dedicated to helping highly-motivated women who seem to have the perfect life but feel stuck and unfulfilled gain clarity and fill in the missing pieces so they can finally realize their full potential and live joyful and deeply satisfying lives they can be proud of.
As a recovering perfectionist and people pleaser with a BS from MIT and a MBA from UC Berkeley, Jarlin knows first hand that happiness and fulfillment do not come from doing things you are “supposed to do.” After white-knuckling it for years to find meaning and purpose through trying harder and doing more, she discovered that true lasting transformation doesn’t have to be a struggle, and the quickest path to a joyful and deeply fulfilling life is through self-love.
Today, Jarlin blends her gentle approach to transformation with her superpowers in organization and structure to provide her clients with customized personal growth plans combining mindset, strategy and practical tools so they can finally expand into the highest and best versions of themselves, and make a meaningful difference with their lives.
Her motto: Add a little self-love…transform your life, change the world.